Stacey. 27. Trying to forge a life beyond the confines of anorexia. Fragments of hope, smiles and loveliness.
7th March 2014
-I am going to fight this relapse
-God is keeping me strong
-I have the most amazing friends who know exactly what...
potato smileys and broccoli for tea like a 5 year old :)
So I’ve decided that every day I’m going to write down the positives of my life. If I happen to struggle or relapse I can...
General points of interest (or disinterest!)
Things have been pretty horrible of late, but I’m going to try to focus on the positives:
- Another patient painted my nails for me so now I have awesome cat nails!
- I got to go outside properly today for the first time in four weeks!
- I’m allowed to go down to the dining room again!
- I had a really useful one-to-one last night.
- My named nurse has been changed to someone much more helpful and capable!
- It’s my birthday next week! :)
That’s right, just do whatever the hell you like. Screw me and my feelings and opinions and rights and just carry on making up your own rules. Yeah, and then change those rules whenever you like to suit yourselves, cos that’s fair. Thanks for that.
Right now it feels like I was getting more support as an outpatient than I am in here.
Today’s points of interest (or disinterest!)
- I finished this embroidery so I get to start my new one, yay!
- It’s been a rubbish week so far.
- I had a review today and it was actually really helpful for a change and I really felt that the team were listening to me. And now I know where I stand with things, which really helps.
- I know that I’m being motivated primarily by blackmail and threats at the moment, but it’s better than not being motivated at all, I guess.
- So SO scared of seeing what my weight has done tomorrow morning. :(
- Guilt, guilt, guilt, guilt, guilt
I know things feel horrible right now but we just have to keep going. I’m here and fighting with you xxx
Anonymous asked: Not 'What HAVE I become' but 'What CAN I become' Move forward and away from this existence x
You’re right, I know, and thank you. I just feel so stuck in a brain that I don’t even recognise at the moment x